When you have it, it’s just part of the way you are. It’s not something you pay attention to, have to work to develop or protect… it’s just there.
If you lose it it becomes obvious by its absence. It may not be obvious to others but for you it will feel like it left a gaping hole filled with uncertainty. Having initially been specific, targeted on one aspect of life, the uncertainty can spread over time.
The downward spiral may have been the result of an initial trigger or event but is quickly forgotten as mundane day to day events become effected. Alternatively, it may be the culmination of a long term decline. Either way, there is nowhere to hide.
Recognising how you’re feeling is a start. Once you recognise it you can start to develop strategies to deal with it.
You feel different. You’ve changed. It feels like you’ve lost something, but in many ways the changes may be positive; you may be more open, more sensitive, more aware, more deliberate.
Where will your new skills take you?